Sins of Distrust

Human forgiveness seems to have a limit. It varies from person to person, but there is a cut-off point. For example, we can forgive people whose behaviour is intolerable and inexcusable for a while, but eventually we begin to distance ourselves.

People often take advantage of our goodness and compassion, but there comes a time when we end that relationship. Jesus advised us to “turn the other cheek”, to “give to everyone who asks of you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back” and “Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you”, but we break off our friendships with disrespectful and dishonest people eventually.

No matter how strong we are, our broken relationships causes us long-term suffering. We sit in judgement of another person, but then we are somewhat like the Pharisee who rejoiced that he was not like the sinners. If we learn to hate our enemies, it virtually destroys us, darkens our spirit and diminishes our capacity for love and to enjoy goodness.

But humility teaches us painful lessons. It reminds us of our feet of clay and the times when our behaviour was inexcusable and intolerable. It reminds us that we’ve hurt other people too and taken advantage of their goodness and compassion.

It is in these moments that we feel the need to turn to God and ask for forgiveness, if only out of fear of losing our souls. But, then we can run into trouble. We find ourselves asking questions like, “Why should God forgive me?”. The memory of our sins creates such intense fear in our soul that we begin to doubt the goodness of God and His willingness to forgive us every time we go to Confession.

Even if we could believe that God would forgive us once or twice, we might doubt if He would continue to forgive us, especially when we find ourselves repeatedly committing the same sins. Doubt creeps in and we cease to trust in God. But did you know that to doubt the Goodness and Mercy of God is a sin? This is one of the most astounding insights revealed by Jesus to St. Faustina. He told her, “How painfully distrust of My goodness wounds Me! Sins of distrust wound Me most painfully”. (Diary 1076)

But in the Divine Mercy Novena, Jesus asks us to bring to Him all the “the meek and humble souls and the souls of little children, and immerse them in My mercy. These souls most closely resemble My Heart”. (Diary 1220) We should take the time to deeply reflect on this passage, because it gives us a real insight into the true heart of Jesus. When we doubt that Jesus will forgive us, we must remember who we are talking to. Of course this is not a licence to take advantage of His goodness and mercy, but it is to believe that when our human weaknesses give way to temptation or our lack of wisdom, that God understands, sees our remorse and desires to forgive us, because He loves us.

Our doubts create fear in our souls. Many people’s lives have been completely destroyed because they never truly understood the infinity of God’s mercy and love for them. They failed to understand how gentle He is. We can often believe that God is like us, namely that there is a cut-off point in our relationship with Him. But this is not so. No matter how long we have been away from Him or no matter how bad our sins are, there is always a door open to God’s Mercy. As Jesus said, “The greater the sinner, the greater the right he has to My mercy.” (Diary 723)

Jesus wants us to know this so that it will bring peace to our souls so that we can grow in holiness. Jesus wants us to enjoy our life and to be able to cope with the suffering that is a part of everyone’s life, but we cannot achieve this without the Word of God in our souls, guiding us and making us wise and loving. His Word cannot be planted in our souls unless we trust Him. This is why trust is so important in our relationship with God, for if we do not trust Him, it cuts us off from all the rest of His grace. If you have doubts about God’s mercy, remember it is a sin to doubt His Mercy and Goodness and take the time to really reflect on this exceptionally important passage in the Diary and you will see how it will benefit you and help you grow in holiness and happiness.